Thursday, December 15, 2016

10 Things Every Man Should Be Able to Do in a Successful Relationship

You see a spider! Do you squish it or jump up and down doing your best cheerleader impression? Hopefully, you know the correct answer to this hypothetical scenario but being a man means different things to different people depending upon their point of view. That said, our basis of “being a man” typically comes from the societal norms of what women want a man to be. After all, they are the ones that hold most of the control in a relationship so this article is devoted to a woman’s perspective of what her man should be able to do. Warning, guys: you might not like some of this but if you can do 8 out of 10 of these, you should be in good shape with your better half.

Be a listener, not a problem solver. When your lady speaks to you, listen to what she says and the tone of her voice, her mannerisms, and any other signals available to accurately gauge her emotions. Women do not expect you to solve their problems, but they expect you to understand their plight. So keep your Home Depot Mr. Fix It persona in check and pay attention to her.

Be a provider. Sure, women today are self reliant and don’t need men. However, they choose to have a man (in most cases). Societal norms are ingrained into our psyches and will obviously interfere with your relationship if your job requires the phrase “would you like fries with that” at age 35. Therefore, be a good provider for your mate and future family because a woman’s nesting instincts will be completely shut down if you can’t support an adequate lifestyle.

Be a handy man. I’m not suggesting you need to turn into Bob Vila, but doing simple hands on weekend warrior projects makes your lady feel that she didn’t pick a momma’s boy. I know its stereotypical, but sporting that tool belt might be one of your best friends when it comes to your relationship (hint: a turn on for her). Just remember to avoid the low riding jeans and the plumber’s “vertical smile”!

Be a great father (if relevant). The first time your lady sees you holding your baby while you are passed out in a rocking chair, cradling your baby boy/girl that is wide awake playing with your messed up hair, wrinkled pajamas, and sporting the worst morning breath ever – she will fall in love with you all over again. So be the best dad in the world.

Be a man. Sure, its popular to be a metrosexual in some circles but the reason classics always come back into style is that they’re the best. So wear your version of your “what makes a man a man attitude” with pride. Kick back during football games, play in the mud with your dog, wear your 10 year old college T-shirts, and do your worst John Wayne impression even though she might claim she hates it, she really doesn’t mind. If she loves you and knows you well, the fact that you have fallen into your role as the man of the house will show her that you’re committed to her.

Now that we have some broad topics covered, lets take a different approach by giving very detailed examples of what makes a good man great in his lady’s eyes. These are the stories of worship and praise that make you a legend on ladies nights out or in the twice a week aerobics class.

Its 4am, and your 8 months pregnant wife is hungry. You roll out of bed to make her a peanut butter, pickles and tuna fish sandwich because that is her favorite 4am snack. The smell is horrific, but fortunately you are so sleepy you don’t even notice. This is the supportive side that women are go nuts over. If you do the little things that we men often overlook, you’re set for life with this woman.

You are in a club and encounter your date’s ex boyfriend. He insults her, in front of you and everyone else. What do you do? Common sense and non violent rules should always apply, but nothing impresses a woman like defending her honor. I’m not suggesting you knock the guy out, but stand up for the lady that you brought. If you do knock him out, make sure she’s a lawyer or a orthopedic surgeon because you might need one or both.

Its a dark rainy night and you’re driving back from a great first date and boom! Flat tire. Roll up your sleeves and get it changed without her helping you. Practice in your own driveway if you can’t change it yourself because its incredibly embarrassing to call AAA to change a tire. If you do call AAA, Man Law states that you should be forced to watch Oprah for 24 hours minimum for your lack of basic man skills. While we are on the subject, learn to change the oil in her car and put a roadside safety kit together for her. Its very simple to do and she will love that you are concerned for her safety.

Its your anniversary and you have a well orchestrated special event planned for your lady. Doesn’t matter what the evening entails, but the simple fact that you took the time to plan something in her honor is worth some serious bonus points. It doesn’t mean you’re a wimp or girlie man that you love your lady. Quite the contrary, its one of the best things imaginable to keep a relationship churning on all cylinders.

An evening on the town is planned. You pick up your date, and open the car door for her. You open the door at the restaurant. You pull her seat out at dinner. Yes guys, being a gentleman still works wonders for you. Practicing consistent acts of gentlemanly behavior and chivalry will never go out of style. It might take some time to adjust to this, but remember, only a lazy man’s idea of opening the door for his lady involves pushing the keyless entry button on your car.

The basic point here is to be an all around decent guy, not to be Superman. Being a man is fun, and done correctly its very rewarding on multiple levels. Being a good companion means different things to different people, but at our core, we all crave a certain amount of values and attention so find what your lady likes and build from there. Remember, men are visual creatures and problem solvers so use these gifts to your advantage, remember the concepts here and apply this rules to your current/next relationship and the “he should have” comments will soon be the “oh my gosh, guess what he did for me” comments will make you the envy of the beauty salon.

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